Talk:A great boring day/@comment-24922135-20160910003503
In retrospect, this review may come across a bit harsh. But in my defence it is 1:34 AM right now and I am tired as hell. The review starts focusing more on positives as it goes on. Just to point out: when writing this CaT's comment has not loaded on the page so I don't know how much of this is being repeated from what he said. "Coldblast transforms back into a dry Ben" Okay I started writing this comment at this point because my God does that show how generic your main character is. "Gerry says Mike should not mess around with the Opposmnitrix." why would Gerry know what it's called? Also, why is there ZERO DIALOGUE in this episode? what few words are actually meant to be said between characters, you put in brackets instead. Also on at least one occasion his name became "Garry". I suppose the powers of the aliens are reasonably shown in this episode, but the gems seem to have as many powers as they need with no limit (granted this is episode 1, so I'll let that slide). But why does Gerry know so much about the aliens? And if you're trying to draw the obvious parallel to Grandpa max lemme just say a few things: *Grandpa max at least tried to hide his knowledge of aliens *if this is supposed to be a trix that gives aliens opposite powers (which it doesn't, it seems to give random powers), then how does he know ANYTHING about the abilities of the aliens? This episode also runs into the unfortunate problem that does tend to come with zero dialogue. There is so much exposition that isn't hidden in the slightest. You give us ALL the information we need as though we're the omnipresesnt observers, and not actually a part of the universe. That is unfortunately one of the worst ways to break the fourth wall whilst writing, and part of the reason why people hate non-diegetic narration in movies. Over all the idea of the Opposmnitrix intrigues me greatly, however the execution (at least in it's current form) isn't great and is at some points hard to follow. It would bode better if you were at least a little more upfront with how much of this plot is cut straight from 'And Then There Was 10' because the dialogue in this state is doing nothing to help you. Also I have something I would like to say but this does not reflect on your episode much at all and is entirely subjective to me. In my opinion, the opposite of Four Arm's power is not fire. That should've been obvious to you when Heatblast's powers became water (that being said, you've clearly made Coldblast far more interesting than just heatblast with water, kudos). Personally I would've given Four Arms psychic powers, maybe called him Four Minds instead. I feel like that might have made for a more interesting juxtaposition, but again that is just me and not really a criticism on your episode.